I have been trying to do some organizing of digital photos lately, taking a minute or two (more like a half hour or so once I get going) to move pictures into folders, to file them in my Dropbox and to back them up so I don’t lose them. It’s a fun task and often a surprising one when I get a folder done and play through the pictures like a slide show. Specifically when I look at pictures of the kids and how they have changed so much over the course of the last few years, I am struck by the inexorable effects of time. Sous Chef and I were looking through a folder last night and, lingering over a picture of the kids and the Cinnamon Girl, I said to Sous Chef of the Cinnamon Girl: “she’s hasn’t changed at all.” Sous Chef agreed.
And my Cinnamon Girl hasn’t really changed since I met her.
Does she look more beautiful today than the day we got married? Yes, she does.
Has she gotten smarter each day, each month, each year? Yes, she has.
Am I more in love with her now than I ever was before? Yes, I am.
But has she changed in any fundamental way? No, she hasn’t.
She remains incredibly smart and funny. My Cinnamon Girl can talk about any topic, can engage on any subject and can hold any crowd. I saw this in action recently when she and I went out to dinner with a group of my co-workers. Telling stories of her former life as a lawyer, she was deeply insightful, appropriately off-color and incredibly entertaining. I sat next to her thinking, and not for the first time, “what’s this amazing woman doing with me?”
She remains a wonderful parent to the kids we share, is often the person they go to for advice, is always the person they go to for ready understanding and acceptance. She loves them and they love her. But I love her the most-est. Count on that.
She remains breathtakingly gorgeous. I am so very lucky to see her both as I fall asleep and as I wake up.
In recent months, we’ve had many deep conversations – deeper than our normally deep conversations – about life and the nature of time passing and the strength of our friendship and our marriage. I’ve watched her courageously stand up to new challenges. I’ve seen her face some dark fears. I’ve been brought to tears as she’s triumphed.
When I met her, long before we were dating, I thought that she was one of the strongest women I’d ever met. I knew that she was confident and self-assured. I could tell that she was brilliant.
Each day that goes by and, certainly, each year has done nothing to call into question those early impressions.
My Cinnamon Girl hasn’t changed in the years I’ve known her. She’s only become more herself. And, as I love that self as much as anything in the world, I couldn’t be more joyful.
Happy birthday, Cinnamon Girl – MY Cinnamon Girl.