Tag Archives: son’s birthday

Too Many Crossroads, Not Enough Tears | Stretch At 21 And A College Graduate

Related Content from And There Came A Day

So, it has come to this: Stretch turns 21 years old today.


We have been through this before as HJ jr got there a few months back. We have crossed this particular Rubicon.

But, not only does Stretch cross the 21 threshold today, tomorrow, he graduates Gonzaga University and prepares, in a few short weeks, to begin his Master’s studies at the University of Notre Dame.

I am not sure which milestone is more affecting but I can tell you, I am emotionally compromised thinking about the little boy who used to spend hours playing Backyard Football, the middle school kid who laughed and laughed at something outrageous The Cinnamon Girl said to him, the high school student who made incredibly close friends, led retreats and loved his siblings, the college student who did so well he got himself into his dream school for post graduate studies and the young man who will dedicate his life to educating others.

We could not be more proud of Stretch, of the young man he has been and the man he is becoming.

We love you.

Happy Birthday!

Happy graduation!

Happy next phase of your life!


Leave a comment

Filed under Birthday, Family, Graduation, Stretch


Related Content from And There Came A Day:

The number of rites of passage is quickly running out.

As of today, as far as HJ jr is concerned, there are very few of them left.

HJ jr is 21.

I do not have any words for how proud I am, how excited I am and how dedicated I am to this young man.

What a blessing he is. What a man he is. What a joy today is!

A photo retrospective in 21 scene – ENJOY!

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Leave a comment

Filed under Birthday, Family, Fathers and Sons, HJ jr

20/20 Vision – Happy Birthday, Stretch

Related Content from And There Came A Day

MatthewStretch turns 20 today. 10 x 2. 5 x 4. 2 decades.

I do not know how this happened so quickly.

I do not know where kid went, the one who, as a toddler, would wake up incredibly early – we are talking before 5:00am here – and drag me out of bed to play with his “guys” (his little plastic football players).

I do not know where that same kid who wanted to play every sport imaginable for as long as the days, weeks and seasons would last has gone.

I do not know where the boy who would sit in front of a computer screen playing “Backyard Football” hour-after-hour has run of to or where the kid who was sure he was going to be an NFL wide receiver or tight end has flown.

I have been looking for the guy who sat next to me at the conclusion of a frigid cold, heartbreaking Denver Bronco loss with a tear literally freezing running down his cheek.

Likewise, I have been searching out the student who sometimes asked me to read his papers and asked for help on his homework.

High and low I have sought the 6 foot 7, red robe wearing graduate I hugged as he walked across a special stage.

What I have found in these searches – what I have found with this new 20/20 vision of Stretch  now that he is 20 – is a young man on his way to adulthood. Well on his way.

I have found a young man upon whom others rely.

I have found a young man who cares deeply about his world and those around him.

I have found a prayerful young man, a passionate young man, a smart young man.

I have found a young man who it is both honor and privilege to call “son.”

And I have found just how lucky we, his bonus mom, his brother and sister and I are that he is in our family.

Happy birthday, Stretch. Many, many, many returns.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Leave a comment

Filed under Birthday, Family, Fathers and Sons, Holidays, Stretch

Stretch Turns 19

Related Content from And There Came A Day

More than a few words on Stretch today on the occasion of his 19th birthday:

Our kid has grown into a fine young man. Caring and compassionate, Stretch  is the type of guy who holds open the door, who asks if he can help, who genuinely cares. I don’t know how much his parents have had to do with making him who he is, I just feel both profoundly lucky and profoundly blessed that he’s become the man he has.

We miss him when he’s away at school.

Stretch loves sports, I mean LOVES sports. The Cinnamon Girl notes that he will turn on the television for anything involving a bat, a bat or a coach. She’s right.

He loves his family and truly takes joy from being with and teasing Sous Chef and HJ jr. He shares the same enthusiasm for his cousins, even when they are hanging all over his arms and legs as if they were limbs of a tree.

He loves his girlfriend friends and we delight in getting to know them through his stories of them.

He loves a good joke, a good laugh, a good moment.

And I love being around him and, as I’ve said many, many times, it’s my privilege to be his dad.

Happy Birthday, son. I love you and I love you and I love you (should go on 19 times).

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

1 Comment

Filed under Birthday, Family, Fathers and Sons, Stretch

19 Years … My God, That’s Almost 20!

Related Content from And There Came A Day:

There are more than a few things that make me feel my age, but nothing does so more poignantly than marking the passage of time by the years my kids have been on the planet.

HJ jr turns 19 today. Could anyone, please, tell me how that happened?

I’ve never met anyone like HJ jr. Intelligent and funny, he sees the world in a manner that no one else I’ve ever met does and I often leave a conversation with him thinking how much different or how much better the world would be if more people viewed it the way he does.

He is passionate about what he believes – he caucused for Bernie Sanders this year!

He is driven by his interests – he built his own (gigantic and fully functional) computer from the ground up.

He is the most reflective and thoughtful person his age I know.

He is on the journey that is challenging and necessary as he approaches his (gulp!) adulthood!

I am lucky to have HJ jr as my “bonus” son and my life would be so much less rich without him.

Happy 19th and remember, there are no cars in Australia.

Good night.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.



Filed under Birthday, Family, HJ jr

HJ Jr Turns 18 Today

March 9 has not been just a day on the calendar since I married The Cinnamon Girl almost ten years ago now, though one member of the household has continually tried to down play its significance. Though his brother and sister and his mother and I would love to make a bigger deal about his birthday – especially THIS one, his 18th – we (primarily) will follow his wishes on this day of all days.

HJ jr is pleased to be 18. He’s looking forward to the next steps in his life – to his graduation from high school and his entrance into college and the slow opening of the wider world. He’s ready, mainly because The Cinnamon Girl has done such a great job raising him. He knows he’s ready.

But he doesn’t like to have a fuss made about him. He doesn’t seek the spotlight. He doesn’t want many words about him said or written. He certainly doesn’t want ANY singing.

Indy Fall 2014

There are so many things about HJ jr that impress me. There are so many things about him that astound me. He’s one of the most self-assured kids I’ve ever known. He is introspective and reflective. He is not afraid to hold opinions somewhat outside the Venn Diagram of “traditional” thought. He is unintimidated.  He’s brave. He is knowledgeable and ready to share. He is special and is in the process of becoming something extraordinary.

I love this kid – this young man – and it’s been one of the great privileges of the last decade of my life to be in his.

Happy Birthday, HJ jrI can’t promise I won’t sing to you. I can’t promise I won’t say “I love you.”

Because I do.




Filed under Birthday, Family, Fathers and Sons, Parenting

Happy Birthday, Stretch… Now Think About Not Going To College.

Today, Stretch turns 17.

God in Heaven.

2012-10-07 22.37.12

Sunday, he graduates high school. That’s another post for another day (to be written embracing a box of Kleenex).

Here’s the deal, kid: how about considering not going to college? How about staying home? You know, with me?

(You will be with your other family members, too, of course…)

2012-07-10 16.36.41

When you skipped kindergarten, middle school seemed a million years away. High school? An eternity.

Now, we looking at you moving off to school in a few short months at 17 years-old.

Sure, I could have, I should have seen this coming. But, the years, man, they travel fast.

One day you’d be 3 and you’d tumble down the stairs toward the unfinished, hard concrete floor. I’d skid across four feet to catch you averting which would certainly have been a sickening splat. “Save, Roy!” the contractor who was working on finishing the basement would yell.

The next day you’d be 11 and you’d run across a soccer field, then face plant from the slightest contact of an opposing player, illustrating to all that you’d perfected the art of faking an injury. Watching you writhe and contort on the ground on a weekly basis? Well, there were worse ways to spend Saturday mornings.

A week later, you’d be 13 and you’d be a freshman in high school. You’d make the basketball (B) team, but miss out on your first love, the baseball team.You’d find new dreams to follow.

Then, you’d be 16, and you’d talk about your hopes for becoming a leader for retreats and freshman orientations during your senior year. I would think, they’d be crazy not to have a kid like you as a leader of younger men. They weren’t crazy. You were chosen for leadership.

And then you’d be 17. Today.

2014-05-11 12.43.482014-01-27 06.02.19

Your step-mother and I couldn’t be prouder of you. Your sister couldn’t love you more. Your bonus-brother couldn’t be more interested in where your life will take you.

But I have an idea: stay home. Don’t go to college. I’m going to miss you too much.

2014-01-19 16.05.14

1 Comment

Filed under Family, Fathers and Sons